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End of Summer
 
What Does Fanzig Mean?
by Erik Burnham
(intro by Michael Hutchison)

The meaning of the term "Fanzing" is, to me, the editor, obvious! It's a fanzine with "ZING!" I didn't invent the term; that honor falls to Marc Campbell, Fanzing's founder. However, not everyone appears to grasp this. It must seem no more than a nonsense word. How else to explain the number of people who can't get the name right?

Many call it "Fanzig"? What the heck's a Fanzig? I considered this to be just a typo, until even the Eagle Awards listed us as "Fanzig" on their ballots. At this point, I considered it a serious enough error to purchase the domain www.fanzig.com just in case someone typed it in wrong. And in April of 2000, I was delighted to see that the Minnesota Comic Book Association was kind enough to give us a large blurb in their advertising. Too bad it said "Michael Hutchinson's Fanzig", which not only takes the n out of Fanzing but then stuffs it into my last name. (I would not have been proprietary about it, had I written it, but I think they included my name because I'm local talent.)

Microcon Flier

What the heck is a "Fanzig"? Is there an actual something called a Fanzig? For the answer to this, we turn to Erik Burnham, who was kind enough to do a little research for us:

I looked Fanzig up. It's been a popular word for quite some time, as the research showed… and always almost in the limelight. The top 10 things Fanzig has meant:

10) An offshoot of this ubiquitous but unnamed cult that likes to walk sideways.
09) The original title to Michael Jackson's "Thriller."
08) A small, purplish vegetable grown in the back of a shanty in the middle of the Congo that - when eaten - forces you to speak ebonics.
07) Charles Foster Kane's pet gibbon.
06) Tax software for the homeless.
05) A popular, entertaining zine for those with speech impediments and stuffed up noses.
04) A type of dog specifically bred to fetch AAA batteries.
03) The third most popular soap opera in Guinea-Bissau.
02) The macguffin Spielberg and Lucas have been clashing over, the true reason for the holdup of Indiana Jones 4.

…And the number one thing Fanzig has meant:
01) The bubblegum pop outfit "Glen D" fronted before writing "Mother."

This list was pointless. You just may possibly be dumber for having read it. I apologize, on behalf of myself and former pop superstars Color Me Badd. -- Erik


This column is © 2000 by Erik Burnham (with Michael Hutchison)
 
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